Anticipation
by TR-Fanfic
Summary: Mac sits in an airport, worrying, remembering, praying he'll come back to her!


These are two completely different scenes that begged to be intertwined in my mind. And who am I to deny them? If those two scenes want to be together, I'll happily oblige and wish them all the best.

This can be in any timeline. Your choice.

All mistakes are my own, and since I don't tend to catch my own typos, I'm apologizing for those in advance.

I don't own JAG, but if I did, I would have had an entire episode where Harm and Mac are stark naked the whole time and just covering up their naughty parts by plants and furniture and big magazines in every scene. Because that would be freaking hilarious!

Honest feedback is always appreciated.

Anticipation

By TR

Rated: STEAMY!

3 months previous:

The muscles of his back shuddered. Legs tensed. As his hips thrust, burying himself strong and deep inside her. Then pulled back out in a slow, steady, aching retreat. He thrust again. She cried out, gasped, moaned, would have begged for more, faster, if she could only remember how to form a coherent sentence.

He slowed his movements, then stopped, buried to the hilt. "Mac?" His voice was breathless, shaking with passion. "Baby, open your eyes."

She struggled to do as he asked. Could only get her eyelids to half mast. That was good enough.

"Breathe for me."

Her lips worked, eyes shone with moisture. "I can't," she managed.

He smiled, gathering a bit more of his wits about him. And just because he wanted to, he pulled out slow again, and gave her another steady thrust. Her nails dug into his hips. He leaned down and gave her a soft kiss. "You have to."

"Wh…why?"

His voice turned smoky, velvet. "Because," he said as he hoisted himself up onto his arms to be able to see her more clearly. "If you can't breathe, you can't answer my question."

This had her eyes coming fully open.

He dropped to his elbows, stroked a finger over her cheek. "God I love you," he whispered. Pulled back. Buried himself again inside her. Sweat formed on his forehead, as he fought not to give in to the passion. "You're so beautiful. Tell me you'll marry me. I don't ever want to…I just… can't live without you."

She gaped for a moment, then gasped as he wrapped his arms around her, buried his face in her shoulder, and began to move inside her in strong, slow, oh so incredible movements. "I love you," He murmured over and over. Until she put a hand on his chest, and whispered for him to stop. She pushed until he rose up so her eyes could meet his.

She struggled to breathe, to think, to remember anything but the phenomenal love she had for the man inside her. "I…I love you too." Her hand reached up to his cheek. "And yes, I'll marry you. I've been married to you forever already."

Present time:

Mac picked up the magazine on the built in table next to the uncomfortable chair she was currently sitting in. Flipped through it, page after page, and was ¾ of the way through it before she realized she'd read every single word in that magazine 3 times over in the last two hours. She knew if she came so early to the airport this would happen, but she just couldn't sit at home and wait any longer. She tossed the magazine down on the table next to her, and gave a polite smile to the old woman sitting across from her. The woman merely gave her a knowing chuckle and went back to listening to her Ipod. She'd been watching Mac for the last hour. And Mac knew she was being watched, but she didn't care. She didn't care about anything but trying to figure out a way to make the time go faster. 20 more minutes. God! I might as well be 20 more years! She could barely stand it! When she picked up the same magazine again, only to realize in disgust what she was doing, and toss it away again, the old woman took pity on her, slowly got up, grabbed the magazine, put it on the opposite table, and sat down next to Mac. She crossed her legs revealing bright red toe nails and jeweled sandals. The dark velour of her "Juicy" track suit matched the beads on her sandals perfectly. She smelled of "Cool Water". Mac had to smile. The woman didn't put much weight on stereotypes, that was for sure. She had to be an easy 150 years old. The woman switched off her Ipod and stowed it in her bag. Put an arthritic hand out to Mac. "Nicole", she said by way of introduction. Mac smiled, noticing the slight French accent. "Mac," she replied.

Nicole frowned. "Mac? You don't look like a Mac to me."

Mac laughed, "I'm afraid you don't look much like a Nicole to me."

"Well I do, where I come from."

Mac chuckled, and felt the ball of nerves start to loosen in her belly. She was thankful for the distraction. "And where might that be?"

"Roussillon."

"France?"

Nicole nodded. "I haven't been back home for a long time. But there are Nicole's everywhere." She winked at Mac. "The nursing homes are full of them."

Mac had to laugh again, "I find that hard to believe."

Nicole shrugged. "Doesn't mean it's not true."

"Touche'" Mac grinned for a moment, but it died away when she realized only three more minutes had gone by.

"It's tough isn't it?" Nicole said, gesturing to the clock. "Waiting to say hello, is almost as bad as saying goodbye. Almost."

Mac simply nodded.

"Though saying goodbye is no picnic either. Believe me I know. When you don't know for a fact that the one you love is going to come back to you, despite all of your intentions and plans. And you say your 'I love you's and your 'be safe's and everything but what you really want to say. What you really want to say is 'please don't leave me!' but you don't. Because it lays you wide open and vulnerable. And it's not fair no matter how you look at it."

"Not when he didn't have any choice," Mac said quietly.

"But you still wanted to say it."

"Yes."

Nicole nodded. "So did I. When it was my turn to be where you are. It's tough when your choices are taken away, and all you're left with is the ache of what should be, and what can't be. And you watch him walk away, after the tears and the kisses and the hugs and the promises, and every sense you have aches to remember everything about him, but you can't. All that you remember is his back as he walks away, and disappears around the corner."

Mac watched the old woman as she took a perfectly manicured hand and wiped a tear from her eye. "Did he come back?" She asked.

Nicole nodded. "Every time, but the last. I waited in that airport for 8 hours before I found out that he hit a patch of ice on the way to catch his plane, and was killed in a head on collision. It was 2 months before our wedding."

Sympathy leapt to Mac's eyes. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay. It was a long time ago." She replied, playing with the ring that still resided on her finger. "That was my first and last attempt at love."

"How long ago?"

Nicole pursed her lips. "It's got to be 60 years by now."

Mac's eyes grew huge. "And in all that time, you didn't find anyone else?"

"He was my heart Mac. Part of me. And I firmly believe that souls never die. He's still with me. Holds me when I'm scared, when I'm cold, when I'm hurting. I just have to reach out for the part of him that lingers on, and I can feel him close. Even now."

Touched beyond words, Mac sighed, and hoped that if life took one of them away from each other, that death still wouldn't be able to separate them.

Nicole sighed. "I'm sorry, I came over to calm your nerves and now I've made you sad."

"It's okay," Mac said. "It's good to know that I'm not the only one in that boat. He's my heart too."

"I'm sure he is. But you won't have to go through what I did. At least…not today."

"How do you know that?"

Nicole smiled, "because I think that man who is rushing toward you like you're an oasis in the desert, isn't about to let that happen."

Mac whirled and barely had time to stand before Harm wrapped her in his arms, lifted her off her feet, and kissed the breath out of her. Before she could apologize for not being out there to greet him, he told her his plane had come in early. She sighed, nearing tears, and buried her face against his chest.

"Please don't leave me again," She said quietly. "I don't care if it's fair of me to say. Please don't make me do this again."

He smiled against her hair. "I'll do my best. And Mac," He said, tipping her chin with the pad of his finger. "I always come back."

"I hope so," she whispered. Then turned to see a grinning Nicole pull her Ipod from her purse.

"Thank you." Mac told her. "And…good luck."

Nicole smiled. "I'd say the same to you, but I see that you don't need it." She turned to Harm. "Marry that woman as soon as you can!"

He grinned. "I plan on it!"

Nicole gave an approving nod and put in her head phones. She smiled as she watched Harm take Mac by the hand, and walk toward the exit.

End of scene. Good? Bad? Granuloma annulare? Let me know


End file.
